How to be More Indiana Jones
A Nerdtown Gazette Post
With the release of “Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny” this week (June 30th), you are doubtlessly wondering, “How can I be more like Indiana Jones this summer?” To help answer that very question, we turned to our knowledgeable colleagues at the Nerdtown Gazette who provided this quick guide to being more like Indy.
The Nerdtown Guide to Being More Like Indiana Jones
Adopt Some of Indy’s Fashion Sense
The immediate impulse here is to go for Indy’s iconic brown fedora hat. And, if that is the look you want, we here at Nerdtown will not try to discourage you. However, be aware of a couple things. First, fedoras are more expensive than you would think. A good quality one could easily cost you a couple hundred dollars. Sure, you could go for a cheap fedora, but that is not going to really stand up to running across speeding Nazi trains or being thrown through the windows of speeding Nazi trucks. Also, even if you are willing to spend all that money, you might look more like a hipster than a world-weary adventurer.
Our suggestion, if you are going to add one article of Indy’s look to your own, add the bullwhip. Only people of action and adventure carry bullwhips. Think about it, who carries a whip? Cowboys, lion tamers, and renegade archeologists, that’s who. If you are walking around with a whip coiled and hanging from your belt, you are ready for anything. And, to our knowledge there is nothing illegal about carrying a bullwhip. (Editor’s Note: We have done no research into that claim. Best to consult your local constabulary.) If nothing else, the whip will be a tremendous conversation started at cocktail parties.
Use the Indy Hack for Faster Summer Travel
Obviously, to live more like Indy you need to travel to far off and exotic locations. On his adventures Indy has taken us to Nepal, India, South America, Egypt, and Morocco, among many other places. New and distant locations are necessary for adventure. However, part of the problem is actually traveling to these locations. Countless hours going through airport security, long flights, layovers, missed connections, travel can be such a nightmare that we often just avoid it altogether, and stay home.
Our suggestion, instead of skipping the travel, is to use the Indy Travel Hack. Stand within camera shot of an airplane. Get out a map of the world. Place a big read dot on the map in your rough location. Then, draw a very steady, thick red line from where you are to where you want to be. Make sure to draw the line through some natural stop overs or connection spots. Once the red line reaches your desired location, viola you are there! Much easier than debating with the TSA about whether your travel hand sanitizer is too large for your carry-on. One word of caution with this travel hack, always double check for villainous looking individuals staring creepily over newspapers while you are using the hack. They may be hitching a ride on your red line.
Have an Adventure Buddy
While we often think of Indy as a solitary figure, he always seems to be at his best when he is surrounded by his friends and family. Sure, having another person around can seem like a burden while you are out adventuring. Maybe they get stuck in a plane, and start accidently blowing everything up. Or, maybe when you tell them not to touch anything, they will press against a secret lever in the wall and the roof will begin to crush you with spikes. At times, it certainly does seem like other people are more of a hindrance than a blessing.
We strongly encourage you to reconsider that line of thinking. Adventure buddies are far more helpful than harmful on an adventure. Who else is going to burn you with a flaming torch to break you from an evil curse? Who else is going to have the artifact that you desperately need? Moreover, without a travel buddy, who is going to tell your friends that you named yourself after the dog? (Helpful hint: Your adventure name is your childhood dog’s name and your last name. I am Barnaby Sullivan.) Indy traveled with his ex-girlfriend/future wife twice. He also traveled with his dad, boss, best friend/greatest excavator in all of Cairo, goddaughter, and some kid who has trouble with the multiverse. Each of these was a greater, more compelling adventure because he had people with him.
There you have it. Adventure is waiting for you out there. Follow these three simple pieces of advice and you will have the most adventurous summer of your lifetime. And, don’t forget to see “Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny.”
If you are on Instagram, why not give Gimme A Minute a follow. I will be continuing to randomly share images of my Indiana Jones Memorabilia all summer long.
https://www.instagram.com/gimmeaminute_substack/
Also, if you post any pictures of yourself on an Indiana Jones like adventure use the #SummerofIndy. I am trying to make that a thing.
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